I see that a few more people have started commenting, I appreciate it, I really do. Someday when I hit the big time and start making $10,000 a year I’ll remember you guys. I don’t want to seem like some kind of blowhard here, so instead of telling you what I think about some stupid sports topic, I will instead ask you some questions that have been bothering me.
1. Did anyone hear my USC-is-not-dead promo on the radio, watch USC beat a ranked Oregon team, mistakenly think that I have some credibility, and read this? If so, how disappointed will they be nine questions from now?
2. Did the Cubs choke? Choking implies the Cubs had victory in there grasp and let it slip through their fingers; the series was never really in question. That’s like me saying I choked away my chance to get with Jessica Alba now that she’s pregnant. Don’t worry Chicago, this wasn’t a tragic choke job, it was a just a pathetic performance…I’m not sure if the previous four sentences should make Cubs fans feel better or worse…oh well, I’m sure they’ll drink it off either way.
3. If Tim McCarver describes Manny’s selfish behavior in Boston as “despicable,” what word does he use to describe Brett Favre’s selfish behavior in Green Bay?
4. Does pointing out that Charlie Weis has more wins against Pac-10 teams than Ty Willingham (who coaches in the Pac-10) make me a racist?
5. If five years ago I had told you the Oklahoma City Thunder would play in Billings, Montana and that it was NOT a women’s roller hockey game, but in fact an NBA preseason game would you have believed me?
6. Who is the most deadest?
- Al Davis
- Paul Newman
- Joe Paterno
Note: there is no wrong answer
7. Did NBC get lucky or what? They paid a boat load of money to have the Olympic swimming finals in Primetime, and huge numbers tuned in to watch Michael Phelps break records*. The Republican Party gave the network a gift-wrapped present by adding Sarah Palin to John McCain’s ticket. Tina Fey’s resemblance and ability to play Palin has helped make SNL relevant again, and has done some beautiful cross-promotion for Fey’s show 30 Rock. The Office is hilarious as always, and people say that Heroes is back (I don’t watch the show so I have no clue). Hell, Notre Dame football is 3-0 when playing on NBC, KY3 is the place to be!!!
*Phelps parlayed his Olympic performance into hosting SNL’s premier where he looked like a fish out of water (pun very intended), except for his brief cameo in an SNL digital short.
8. The Detroit Shock won the WNBA finals this past month, does Bill Laimbeer put his WNBA coaching achievements on the same shelf he keeps his NBA playing ones?
9. Now that Kimbo Slice has been exposed as the complete and total fraud he is there is one obvious question: Did his hype machine get big enough to allow him to have his own segment during VH1’s I Love 2008 when it comes out in 2013?
10. Is there anything better than listening to Dallas Cowboys Football on JOCK 98.7?
(When I say ‘cross promotion,’ you say ‘raise.’ Cross promotion-raise! Cross promotion-raise! Cross promotion-raise!)